I completely failed at doing what I was trying to set out to do. It's amazing how being late and then suddenly getting nervous can affect my performance. Never again, that was really embarrassing. Mainly because I knew I did a terrible job teaching the class because my nerves got the best of me.
However, getting the jitters out from actually teaching a Boogiezone class for the first time and realizing how humbling of an experience it was, I'm thankful it happened the way it did. Obviously I would have to take the steps to remedy what was already done but it can't really get any worse than that because I wont let it happen again.
It just sucks that I was good for the whole day, I had my routine done and it felt different when I was choreographing it, and when I even re-taught it to myself to get the counts right.
Then when came time to actually get there everything went against my favor and I completely blanked. It was all in my head and it was all my fault. But now I know what happens when I'm not able to shake something off, and I just have to wait and see what the reception will be for my class when people find it if it ever gets posted up on YouTube.
I feel like I want to apologize to someone, anyone, but that won't do anything. It's definitely a shaky way to introduce myself but it's made me so much of a better person. I learned so much from that experience that I would never want to happen again. It brought me down hard to ground level so I'm still starting at zero at this point.
Maybe a second chance will come along soon but only if I chase it.
Tryna live a dream because that's all I want for the future, nothing less of that. No need for expectations because that's in the past now.
I'm just living in the present moment because life is too beautiful not to notice how perfect things really are. I can easily say I messed up but now at least I've started to do something and had made a first step in the right direction.